What can I say, as far as organising a team for Saturday goes, Jack totally failed. Choosing players that weren’t even available, for the sole purpose of bolstering the teams moral when posting the team on the WhatsApp group. This included several TBC’s (to be confirmed), which seems to be a popular player for all our captains this season. Surely, if they haven’t confirmed by Tuesday, they aren’t playing Saturday.

The hapless captain managed to muster up a total of twelve players for our trip to Capenhurst, before packing his bag, and skipping off to the first team before anyone had noticed he was gone.

---- The Game ----
Things didn’t look great right from the beginning, with Sefton short of a prop, it was uncontested scrum from the start. This nullified a large part of Sefton’s game, and you could already see Anger Management's veins popping out of his head. To add to this Sean Muirhead had recklessly used up fifty percent of his catching ratio by catching a ball in the warm-up.

Capenhurst generously offered us two players to at least give us a fighting chance. A young winger, and an older one that I presume must have been Capenhurst’s equivalent to Sefton’s John Greaves. He was shoved in the front row, to hide him from harm’s way.

Sefton start quite well, with Jonathan Tebbs immediately opening up Capenhurst’s defence through the centres and almost going through to the try line. A scrambling defence rushed across to prevent Tebbs getting an early try for Sefton.

Capenhurst’s strength was in its big set of forwards who proceeded to crash the ball up in an endless stream of short pop balls. This was stopped countless times by Sefton, and led by our grey haired Capenhurst volunteer as he proceeded to take the biggest of the oppositions legs from under them. Perhaps I had been wrong about this ageing veteran, who was more in keeping with Campo’s defensive skills, minus the air tackles. My assumptions were further disproved when he also showed equal talents in passing and kicking the ball. The barometer of skill had been increased to a Graeme Jones level, with an added benefit of being able to run with the ball as well.

Capenhurst’s first try actually came against the run of play, as Sefton attacked the oppositions twenty-two. The ball is suddenly lost, and Capenhurst were able to break quickly, passing out wide, and racing away to the try line.

Capenhurst’s went further ahead with a defensive error from Sefton when their big lumbering second row breaks through our forwards, and is in open space with only Ali Telfer at full back left to stop him. Ali tactically decides not to be trampled over, and implements a perfectly timed McCleary dodge tackle, followed by a diving air tackle for good measure. Never before have the two tackle avoidance techniques been incorporated together, thus demonstrating Ali’s ability to go freestyle. This allowed Capenhurst to go through for a try without a hand being laid on them.

Sefton were also having problems in the lineout with only Luke Griffiths able to jump, the opposition were able to disrupt a lot of Sefton’s ball, so any chances to capitalise on field position were hampered.

By half time Sefton were already four tries down, and Sean Muirhead had used his remaining catch. To add to Sefton’s misery both Jay Evans and two step Pete went hobbling off with injuries, and retired to the side line. With no other players available, this left Sefton down to twelve players, against Capenhurst’s fifteen.

From the restart Sefton’s worst fears came to light with a quick score out wide by Capenhurst, who made the most of their three player advantage.

However, Sefton managed to halt the breaches, and got rare custody of the ball. New member of the squad, Ed Ashworth then showed us a glimpse of what he is capable of, with a solo run from the half way line. Managing to break through, and make a direct route to the try line, whilst fending off several defenders to score an unconverted try.

Though Sefton had plenty of possession in the second half, they struggled to get anything else from the game. Unable to kick for the corners due to their lineout dysfunction, the only option left to tie the opposition forwards in was the uncontested static scrum. This unfortunately was met by superior numbers in the backs when the ball was released.

With twenty minutes to go, Sefton had at least restricted them to thirty points, but now Sefton’s players were getting tired, and the defence was getting increasingly stretched. In the last ten minutes, Capenhurst were able to get three quick tries pretty much unhindered to finally break Sefton’s resolve. In the end, I was tempted to quote Campo, and say ‘make them score out wide, so they struggle with the conversion.

A valiant effort from the Sefton twelve who didn’t give up, despite yet again having to play against the odds. Man of the Match went to the ever versatile Alistair McKie, who slotted in at back row and put a big shift in, to prevent what could have been an even larger score line. If Campo had been there, he would’ve been pleased we kept them below sixty.

---- Who is Sean Muirhead? ----
I’ve been told I’m a bit harsh on Sean, and maybe it isn’t helping his confidence. It has even been suggested I should say something nice about him. I’m sure I have already done that once, therefore, I would be hard pressed to find another positive things to say about him, I just see it as character building. However, I’m not saying I can’t change and adapt my motivation techniques, so I will give it a go.
Sean, you’re consistent. There you go, it hurt me, more than it hurt you Sean.

Next week, the seconds are at home against Winnington Park. Will we get a full squad? Probably only in Jack’s fantasy dream world, I will be prepared for tears.