Sefton RUFC

I can imagine Littleborough is quite an idyllic place in the height of Summer, not so in the depths of Winter. A dead end road to nowhere, nestled in a valley surrounded by a lake. Both the first and second team arrive at a cold, wet, and boggy pitch, confronted by the large, hairy, hostile locals, and that was just the women!

 

The second team went with a scratch side, put together from the limited players available. A late cry-off by Michael Browne left Sefton short in the backs, and Matt Bland didn’t appreciate the late call on Saturday morning, knowingly greeting my call with “oh no!”

 

Our forwards pack was solid enough, but the back line required some rearranging. Brendo, who we recently discovered was best hidden safe within the pack, had to return to the wing, unfortunately exposing him to one of his fears, open spaces. We were happy to borrow Billy Haist from the first team bench, to at least strengthen our attacking options.

 

Littleborough’s pack was massive, and it looked as if they were used to getting the upper hand in the scrums, but Sefton are adept in handling big packs and confidently held their own. Lineout’s also went Sefton’s way in the early part of the game.

 

An initial period of pressure was ridden out by Sefton with a solid defensive line that kept Littleborough at bay. The boot of Gorgeous helped Sefton reach the oppositions five metre line, but they were unable to capitalise on this attacking position. Likewise, Littleborough’s stand-off was equally adept with the boot, and managed to kick them out of trouble.

 

After a 44 mile trip to get here, Brian Gardner enjoyed his fifteen minutes on the pitch before coming off with an injury. To be fair, Brian did warn that he was unlikely to last more than 40 minutes, and that included getting changed, and warming up. I hope he enjoyed the 44 mile trip back home.

 

--- Kicking Update ---

As stipulated every week, kicking is frowned upon in the second team, so I was shocked to see Sean Muirhead, with ball in hand, ready to launch it up field. Unfortunately, he must have hit the sweet spot and it soared out of Sefton’s twenty-two, and bounced out on the opposition’s twenty-two, giving Sefton the lineout, (some who witnessed it, suggested it didn’t come off his foot). Now I say unfortunately, because much as I appreciated the pure luck, and the great odd’s that I would have got at a bookie for Sean making that kick. It now meant he thought he could do it all the time, with the same result, and much worse, it inspired other would be kickers to ‘have a go’. Enter Steve Teal, a hardened veteran of Sefton rugby, built from gnarly wood, and old rusted nails. Catching the ball in Sefton’s half, we expected him to trundle forward, and find the nearest forward opposition to run into, and then fall over (often referred to as a ‘Dobie’). This was not in Steve’s head, as he’d seen the accolade that Sean got earlier, and tried to emulate the success. It did not go well.

 

A period of sustained pressure finally broke Sefton’s resolve and Littleborough were able to get over for a try.

 

Billy Haist’s action at full back ended with a call up to the first team, but he was replaced by an enthusiastic James Wilson, who for a brief spell tormented Littleborough’s back line, until he was also called back to the first team. More misery came to Sefton with JP going off with a dislocated finger, which left Sefton with thirteen players. Gaps started to appear, and it wasn’t long before Littleborough went over for their second try.

 

A yellow card was given to Littleborough’s second row for pulling down a lineout, and this gave Sefton a little reprieve. With the final play of the half, Sefton got a choice of penalties, one in front of the posts, and another out wide. Our Aussie friend for some unspeakable reason wanted the penalty out wide. Common sense prevailed, and Gorgeous kicked the penalty through from in front of the posts, for the three points.

 

With thirteen players and the opposition soon back to full strength, damage limitation was the aim in the second half. The forward’s still managed to hold their own in the scrums, but the lineout’s were getting ever more erratic. The wet, slippy ball wasn’t Ideal for Lancaster’s one handed throw in the lineout, together with the refs insistence of perfect central placement. This led to a lot of turn over ball in good attacking areas. It wasn’t long before the tries started to flow for Littleborough, and our players heads started to drop.

 

It wasn’t all defensive duties, there were periods of attacking brilliance. Adam Hunter provided plenty of energy throughout the game, in attack and defence. His one moment to shine came when he broke out of Sefton’s half in a counter attack and raced up the pitch. He found himself with only the full back to beat, and looks for support, to find Jack Crone on his left. Now Jack is not the quickest player on the pitch, in fact he was only there in support because there was a scrum there several minutes earlier, and he was just coming back on side. However, Adam must of evaluated the situation, and instantly ruled out the possibility that he would be better off taking on the defender himself, and passes to Jack. This had the expected outcome, as several defenders caught him up and dragged him down like a pride of lions bringing down a buffalo.

 

The score could have been kept below a respectable fifty, if not for the inaction of our hapless Aussie. The ball was knocked on by Littleborough, and then by Campo as he tried to pick it up. He stops expecting a scrum, but the opposition pick it up as he stares at them. They run past him, and he is still gawking at them, only when they place the ball over the try line does he come out of his trance, realising that you should always play to the whistle.

 

One to forget for Sefton, but good performances from Matty Cunningham and James Hamling in defence, and some great ball carry’s from Jack Crone. Man of the Match went to Adam Hunter for his back row performance.

 

The coach trip home was very entertaining, with all the younger players made to entertain Kev Mainwarring with a song of their choosing on the way back. Let’s just say they fulfilled their obligation with great enthusiasm.

 

Lanky

   

   

Campo’s Addendum to Lanky’s Drivel: What Really Happened….

 

Kicking Update

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Yes, yes, we all heard about Sean Muirhead’s massive 20-20 kick. Thankfully, it wasn’t Jamie Luck or Brian or Goulding, as we would probably NEVER hear the end of it.

But, what Lanky carelessly forgot to mention, was the gale force wind blowing up the valley under the M6 Motorway.

A gale force wind that would’ve taken any kick places kicks don’t normally go.

Sean was just a very, very lucky guy, that was in the right place for the right 80 minutes.

Maybe we could commend him for ‘reading the wind’, something that Jay Evo has a lot to learn about.

More likely we put it down to the elements, and make sure he doesn’t get the ball again.

 

As for the specialist second row, Steve Teale, I can only think that the boot to the head he received earlier, bravely diving on a loose ball, had temporarily affected his senses.

What else could possibly consider a kick in general play, with acres of space around him?

To cater for your possible temporary amnesia Steve, let me take you though your ‘kick’.

Firstly, I can understand you don’t see much, with your head usually buried between the curvaceous prop’s buttocks, but kicking is usually done with the feet, or, more specifically, one foot.

Your kick Steve, was done by your knee, and then one foot.

Also understandably, this double kick procedure is rather difficult to finesse, so again, maybe the elements, or the Gods were with you.

Rugby kicks, unless you’ve been stalking Jay Evo, are meant to go forward.

Your kick Steve, went backwards.

How this was achieved, with your running forward momentum, and a fierce tailwind, has defied the laws of physics.

Maybe your kick Steve has finally sorted the old “God vs Science” question, but it certainly didn’t involve the Rugby Gods.

   

   

Campo’s Incredulity

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Firstly, please let it be known that Campo will always insist on playing by the whistle.

Especially when you are playing rugby at the lowest of stranded.

Because rugby at the lowest level is usually officiated by refereeing of the lowest level.

Basically, anything can happen. Anything is allowed.

 

Today though, we were witness to the most obvious of knock ons from the Littleborough 10.

A knock on so blatant that both teams sighed in unison, as they considered yet another tiresome scrum.

A knock on so unquestionable, that Campo, isolated at fullback, decided that there was no benefit in playing any advantage, and DELIBERATELY knocked on, in a strategic attempt to slow the game down with yet another tiresome scrum.

Unfortunately, there was some Littleboroughian clown that playfully picked the dead ball up and placed it under the posts.

Then, whilst both forward packs had formed the scrum and were waiting for the Ref’s ‘Engage’ call, we hear the Ref actually blowing for a try!!

This brought forward massive disbelief from both teams. Sefton were just dumbstruck, Littleborough were apologetic. The Ref was adamant: “The ball sounded like it came off the 10’s knee”.

How the hell does one get to know what a knee to ball sound sounds like???

But wait! I recall that the Ref was indeed standing near Steve Teale when he did his ‘kick’….

  

Yours,

Campo It-Wasnt-My-Fault